…And don’t let go!

Let go of what, you ask? Well, humor. Truth. Light. It’s like when you’re sitting outside on a beautifully mild night in February, and you see the crescent of the moon. You’re sitting in a spot where the moon’s light is shining just above the tree line, a mountain line, or just above your neighbor’s house. And you KNOW–because of what you know of space and science, and the orbit of the Earth–that the light of the moon will eventually go behind the said blockage. You see it now, but in about 10 to 20 to even 30 minutes later–the moon will be “gone”. It’s not “really” gone. It’s just that you, sitting where you are at the moment on this planet–it appears to have disappeared, and you don’t see it anymore.

Hold ON. You were just basking in the beauty and enjoying the light in the night! The light that was literally being reflected off of the sun itself. Without the light of the sun, the moon would be a dark, wholly, round and mysterious object in space. There’s so many more fascinating ‘facts’ about the moon and how it works, but that’s for another time. Or, for Google.

Sometimes in our nights–figuratively and realistically speaking–it can be a time of serious relaxation. It can be a real beauty and true time of reflecting on what the next day will hold. Sometimes, it’s scary and unknown. Sometimes is exciting and uncharted. I am sure we have ALL had a combination of any of the above! We all know the saying…”Just as the moon reflects the sun’s light, so do we as Christians reflect the Son of God.” Heard that one before? It’s a simple, but yet profound notion. We are brighter than the actual sun if we actually reflect the Son. Sounds like a corny church sign, doesn’t it? I love those. Haha! Actually, I’d like to get a collection in pictures of the best ones around! I am sure there’s a website or something of the like around the interwebs somewhere.

BUT. In this case, it’s true. Hold on to that light. To that reflection you just saw with your own eyes. You see good reflected somewhere, every day. I don’t know if it’s if someone who let you in on a busy lane in traffic, or if someone pushed the grocery cart back for you. Or if someone brought you a meal, or if someone gave you a kind word. Or! My favorite: If someone gave sacrificially out of their lack. Lack doesn’t always mean in terms of “monetarily”. (Although that’s a good one.) It’s their time. To you. To speak your specific love language. And before we go all Francine Rivers and The Five Love Languages…let’s just think simple: Time. It’s our most precious commodity. Every one of us has the SAME “24 hours in a day”. Whether you’re a billionaire or have $.50 to your name. We can always make another buck to give, but we can’t get our time back. But…was it ‘our’s’ to begin with though? Quality question!

I have seen the most precious and sacrificial presentation of this lately. From more than one person. I can’t necessarily go into details here, but myself and my family have been so blessed with the time of other “moons”. Those “moons” were simply just being reflectors of the eternal Light. I know that if you’re reading this, you can probably think of someone who gave their time to you to do _________ {insert here}. They gave to you. And YOU have given to them…whoever they are. Don’t make it complicated. You sent a text, you had a cup of coffee with, you worked, you served, you took the time to understand. You listened to listen and not just to respond. (How I hope you have). And the list goes on: to how you have given of your time. It’s precious.

Anyways, as we continue to move and to orbit in life–the light from the reflections will sometimes fade and seemingly disappear. But, it will be back. What are you going to do with your OWN reflections in the mean time? If you follow the Lord and walk with Jesus: YOU will also continue on with that reflection. Carry that torch on to someone else, even when it’s not necessarily illuminating your own night. You have the ability to reflect the light, and I charge you to keep it going.

Billy Graham–for example, as powerful and illuminating as his light’s voltage was, was not more powerful than what you and I have access to. Just because his humanly body is no longer on Earth as today, February 21st 2018, doesn’t mean the light he reflected is gone with him. His ENTIRE LIFE’s message is that we as his fellow humans could also reflect the Son as he did. He demonstrated how it was done–for SIX DECADES! He had many a dark night, and he may have even wanted to dim his light for a time–because it takes effort to shine. It’s HARD TO SHINE sometimes. It’s hard to keep it up when the going gets tough, painful, not-pretty, and tired. It’s exhausting sometimes to even just “be still” and “reflect”! Well, it is to me, anyway.

But is it worth it? Yup. Does it go unnoticed? Nope. Unnoticed by fellow mankind for a time, perhaps–but not to the Light source. Does the sun ever stop being a star or stop burning at 15 million degrees Fahrenheit in our Milky Way galaxy? Nope! It’s just always there. And the moon is ALWAYS being it’s reflective self–somewhere on the planet for someone to enjoy. Just because we can’t see it where we are, doesn’t mean it’s not there. To someone, somewhere–it’s there. And it’s BEAUTIFUL!

If you don’t see the light anywhere you are, maybe it’s because you’re the one who’s supposed to be reflecting it. You have THE Ultimate Source to reflect from.

Enjoy the physical and the eternal aspects of the Light! It never stops, and is ALWAYS there for you tap into. Happy reflecting, my friends.

 

 

 

 

The 2018 Winter Olympics in Pyeongchang, South Korea is on full force right now. We have so enjoyed watching it…from the very sparkly and high-haired Johnny Weir Commentator from Figure Skating (LoL) to the “cool guy” sounding commentator on the Slopestyle course for snowboarding. We’ve had the Clark family commentary for it all. It’s been fantastic all around so far to see history happen and even watch political history unravel before our eyes. There have also been many interesting facts that I, personally, have learned recently–evidently: condom distribution at the Olympics is a ‘thing’. Well, I’M sorry…I never realized that. Since 1988, evidently. And in THIS Olympics–nearly 37 condoms per athlete are being handed out/made available/just there-for-the-just-in-case. There’s almost 3K athletes in total. They are there for TWO WEEKS. You do the math. WHOAAA…..anyways. I absolutely digress! My GOODNESS though………*clears throat* (But SERIOUSLY though?!!! There’s soooo many directions this blog post could go in, but …..Nope. Digress, Michelle…digress.)

Have you noticed the branding and marketing during all the humanly possible hype? Even from the bottom of the snowboarder’s snowboards. It’s EVERYWHERE. Branding is everywhere. OH MY WORD. There are many equally superior brands out there just vying for attention. And they pay big time for it!

So our three girls–9, almost 6 years old, and almost 6 months (but she’s just concerned about a full belly and clean diaper), are absolutely SOLD on every commercial that comes on. I think there’s a conspiracy theory with marketing and commercials and KIDS. Kids just seem to take commercials at their face value, do they not? They never fail to say something like: “MOMMY! (Or DADDY) We should totally get __________ OR do ___________ because it says it’s the BEST!!” I KNOW there are some adults who think this way too. I’ve met ’em. Sadly not thinking or digging for information themselves, but take everything at face value. There’s always more than meets the eye, ladies and gentlemen. But on a balanced note, not EVERYTHING is a conspiracy theory, either. Balance!! OH, sweet balance.

When we watch the games, if there’s a commercial or something that comes on that is truly just NOT jiving in our spirits—We’ll discuss it if the girls have questions about it and even if they don’t. (This is not just for the Olympics, either, mind you.) Sounds corny, I know. It’s how we roll. (Let the popCORN pop during the show!) There’s a lot they ask about or have questions about when it comes to the world, and Frank and I always do our best to aim them at the truth with those questions. Like arrows out of a bow. And it’s things we need to be talking to them about now. Because they will soon be faced with it without us there. The next generation will be growing up in a world of interesting and challenging proportions. (That’s what the previous generation said, too.) There will be higher levels of social deceit and of deeper levels of hell seen than we see now. If we help this generation build their foundations in TRUTH during this time, they will have something of heavenly stock to sprout out of later on and stand FIRM in. That can’t happen if we shelter, shelter, shelter, shelter. Something that has been on my heart is to TRULY teach what it means to be “IN, but not OF the world”. And YES, I am fully aware of the different ages/stages of the human brain–and what it can actually “understand” and what it just can’t–because it’s not meant to OR designed to. Their physical neurons (brain cells) aren’t meant to understand or comprehend things at younger ages–it’s not the way our Master Creator made us. And yes–it aaaalllllllllllllll sounds so scary as a parent here in the natural. But listen here! Although it’s very meaty and of the UTMOST importance to guide our little ones, God would have NEVER entrusted YOU and {insert child’s name} together as a family unit if He didn’t KNOW you could steward it well.  He sent your child/niece/nephew/grandkid/foster kid/etc to YOU for a reason. It’s wasn’t by chance. Don’t be scared. But DO dig and PLANT yourself in TRUTH so you can also grow it out of your households. It starts with you. It’s a delicate dance between sheltering and letting to sprout. You know. If you have a kid in your life, you know. (Go clean out your britches and I’ll clean out mine.) We got this!

Going back to the Olympics: There’s a LOT to understand about the media and marketing and just everything TV/Radio/Store Ad/Billboard/etc that kids just soak in like a sponge. Because of YOUR wisdom as the parent, uncle, aunt, friend, grandparent, godparent of said kid SEES–this is YOUR responsibility to help them sort all it out. Hopefully through the lense of heaven. Ask for wisdom each and EVERY.DAY. Lord knows I am. (Admittedly, sometimes in a Madea-type voice. LoL.)

There’s fresh revelation daily for those who ask though, for sure. There’s truth for those who seek! God designed us for this, and is NOT surprised by the times we are living in. MORE importantly, He Himself chose THIS TIME and THIS PLACE for your and your’s to be alive in! You could have been alive in the Dark Ages or in Noah’s time, or…..hahaha. {Name it here}. Ever think about that? God chose THIS TIME! And THIS PLACE. He has the armory you need for it, and He has the armory the next generation needs for it, too.

The JOY of the LORD is our Strength!! Don’t be religious to the point of suffocation, because that vine will grow and strangle you and your kids faster than anything. However, make sure to keep your focus on TRUTH. Have fun with the littles and have FUN in the world–God made it to be enjoy, to savor, to truly grasp His original intent for it all. It’s sold to us in different ways sometimes from a place of sin, because….well, sin. HOWEVER! The Light shines brightest in the dark. Take a look around and find what’s right and what’s TRUE–I bet that you will not only find it, but you’ll be able to lead the next generation to it as well. It’s all around us! Just take a look at it. 😉

 

 

Well, hello all! I wanted to just put a little somethin’-somethin’ out there. This month, on February 21st to be exact, Frank and I will have been married for 14 years. 14 YEARS since we made the commitment to each other to love until death do us part. We had a strawberry ice sculpture at our wedding (because of my past and current love for strawberries), strawberries in general all around–everywhere, a Winter Wonderland and MOST awesomely–my dad who married us. Frank also surprised me with a song he sang to me during our ceremony.

Ladies and gentlemen, that is almost HALF OF MY LIFE ago. I am 34 years old. MIND BLOWN.

Anyways! The first 6 months of our marriage: passionate bliss but also passionate NON-bliss. We were and still are two “Type A” personalities. Put ’em together and what do ya got? Bippity-boppity-bent-steering-wheel! Haha. Yes…we had such ‘engaged’ arguments that Frank bent the steering wheel to one of our cars one time. IN HALF. Another time, I pushed him to such a level of anger that a hole the size of his fist went in the drywall of our first apartment. It was a year (or 2 or 3 or 10) later of truly learning ‘the dance’. And not only learning how to ‘dance’ gracefully, but also having wisdom on the whole ’cause and reaction’ thing. That’s not only for scientists, you know. Ladies, we push those ‘buttons’ sometimes–do we not? Guys, you react to the pushing of the buttons sometimes, do you not? And we are STILL learning ‘the dance’, but are getting much more smooth and gracious with it–which is the GOAL after all, is it not??

I feel that in our 14 years together as a married couple, we have made INCREDIBLE strides. We are so thankful for the strides we’ve made together. Not in a boastful way, because we still fall {very} short and are aware of that. But in a way that is saying: “LOOK what God has done! LOOK what He and He alone is DOING with two stubborn, obstinate, pigheaded people!” Imagine for a moment how God sees the unions of married folks He puts together: He knows and sees the AMAZING and absolutely beautiful ends to our married races. It’s up to us to run these races and not throw in the towel. It’s up to us to keep on keeping on…when the going gets mandatorily selfless. And selfishness is forced OUT, because there’s simply no room for it. (And if there is a room of sorts that we put aside for selfishness: queue the discontentment, discord and hell on earth.)

I know there are unique situations that causes ends to these unions. What I am talking about here is the day-to-day stickiness that will help us keep traction on the slippery slopes. If you have been divorced and are re-married: This is for you too. Don’t look at your past and feel or ACCEPT any condemnation. Your starting line is NOW and move forward in that truth. Move forward. Never backward.

I know there will be folks reading this who are not married, and I hope this still encourages you. These same principals can be embraced in family and friendships–OR–if you’re looking and praying for a spouse in your future.

Frank and I have grown to be a well-oiled machine together. (And can I just say that I can’t WAIT to see what the next 14 years holds!!) Sometimes this machine needs fuel, a new coil pack or a new hose or fan, but it’s seasoned with oil and it runs efficiently. The more we KEEP these machines well-oiled (which is a day-to-day process/habit) the LESS time we are in ’emergency’ mode. Let’s be honest here: Emergency mode SUCKS. We’ve been there before! Anyone ever been stuck on the side of the road dialing someone…ANYone to come and get you?

Everyone’s story is different in marriage. Whether it’s in the beginning, middle or end. Comparison to other’s relationships can be a HUGE Debbie-downer…that’s for another post. Comparison also SUCKS.

But we’re all unique people–we always say that as a human race. We are UNIQUE to our very cores. So it would also make sense that our marriages and relationships are also UNIQUE, would it not? What works for one will not work for the other, and visa versa. We’re two UNIQUE people being put together as ONE. Just think about that for a minute…

…

…

Your minute is up. Mind blown? If it’s not, you didn’t really THINK about it. Try again!

Give YOURSELF grace. GIVE YOUR SPOUSE GRACE.

Frank & I still have our ‘moments’ of stubborn, obstinate, pigheadedness. Yup. Sho ’nuff. But you know what? There’s no one I’d rather be having those moments with than him. He will drive me the point of _________ sometimes, but he’s my partner and my well-oiled machine mate. Frank is a man of integrity and he’s like a rock for me. His name actually means “Free Man”. His walk with the Lord is so tender but “warrior-esque” and just… free. He and the Lord have a visible and tangible and unique relationship–it’s one that runs our household and that I feel so VERY confident in. I know it’s going places and I want to go with it!

I could go in to all of the scriptures about what a husband is to be for his wife–but I won’t right now. Frank is ALL those things to me and completes bonus levels all time…it’s the little things, you know. Buying whole wheat bread or organic veggies because he knows I like it, or telling me to go to the gym on a fussy-kid night or giving me a back rub with NO ULTERIOR MOTIVES, husbands. (Sometimes those back rubs come with a motive, mind you. Haha! Keeping it real.) BUT those 14 years of learning to love selflessly can sure teach a lot if you’re a good student to God’s truth and design for marriage. Frank has grown to be one of the best that I know.

This race is not easy. It’s sometimes very difficult. And not only because of our union-of-uniqueness, either. It’s because of our calling in life and being forerunners together. We, as just us two at home together at night–can put TEN THOUSAND DEMONS to flight(Deuteronomy 32:30). Commitment, union and honor. Love. Build up your shield of protection against the hellish darts which will surely come. Those darts may sting for a little bit of time, but they will surely be quenched if you are aware of the water that needs to be poured on the impact points. Forerunners in God’s Kingdom will always have interesting wounds at one time or another. Learning the target points, especially in a marriage, will keep us more efficient at tending to it all. Here’s to tending to the wounds, and the ground taken for the Kingdom each and EVERY day. Bon Courage!!

A BRIGHT orange leopard-print steering wheel cover for my first car ever. Techno/electronic music (which I still love!). Gummy bears in the glove compartment. Head banging while driving. Friends. Family. TCBY as my first ‘real’ job. Decisions. A mom who stalked for my own good. School. High school, that is.

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen! This was my Junior year in high school. Here in “the States”. I was normally homeschooled along with my sisters while on the mission field, but this was our “in the States” year. (We came back to America every 3 years to have a ‘rest’ of sorts.)

I grew up as a missionary kid in West Africa mostly (some in Jamaica and Quebec, CA). If you follow this blog, you’ll see the occasional post of many memories and experiences here and there–some funny and some thought-provoking and some…….well, c’est Afrique!

So in my Junior year, I was ALL that and a bag of chips, per se. Perhaps even Cape Cod Salt ‘n Vinegar potato chips! Man. I sure thought I was. Didn’t we all think we were ‘all that’ at some point though??

I dreamed day and night of being in the USAF and flying F-16’s. That was my dream. I wanted to be a fighter pilot. Also, I dreamed of flying on the C-M Super Galaxy aircraft and working as a nurse to save lives of the injured in our military. I had a poster of this plane in our bathroom! I used to listen to my electronic music and envision situations where I was the hero of the day! So reachable as a Junior in high school, so I thought. However, my dreams of flying in the Air Force were kind of crushed when I realized that my severe scoliosis would be a no-go for being a fighter pilot. But you know? God had MUUUUCH bigger plans for me. I think I actually would have made it in the Air Force. My natural math capabilities are not what they would need to be to fly necessarily, but I truly think if I didn’t have a crooked back–I would have made it somewhere, somehow. It’s all I thought about and I wanted it so much.

But AGAIN! God had even BETTER things in store for me. And I had NO idea. If you know me now and you’re not previous friends or family–after about 2001–you probably would not have known me if that would have been my life’s course. I met Frank, my husband, in 2002 after all! Wow!

Anyways, a long but intricate story cut short: My Junior year. I had a 1986 Mazda 626 as my first car. I TRULY thought I had arrived. Haha! To spruce it up, I decided it needed a bright orange/leopard print steering wheel cover, Mardi Gras beads dangling from the rear view mirror, an endless supply of gummy bears for my passengers and LOTS dance/techno/electronic music. Artists from Alice Deejay, Vengaboys to Eiffel 65. (I am dancing just thinking about those beats now…and head banging!)

I was dating a guy who I thought was going to be my forever guy–and my mom in her wisdom knew MUCH differently and BETTER. I worked at TCBY and she used to come and wait while I got out of my shifts at 11pm from making frozen yogurt treats to watch and make sure I didn’t do anything stupid in the car with this guy. He used to come and wait in the parking lot when I got out of work. I love my mom so much…and now having 3 daughters of my own–have a new found respect for this ‘stalking’. I will, too, be ‘stalking’ if necessary. I pray every day that I won’t be, and that this generation will be different than mine. Oh my word!! Who with kids can relate?! Keep EVERYTHING in your undergarments from top to bottom. Yes ma’am (and sir).

So, as I was saying. My Junior year. I remember my mom and dad talking about what the next year was going to look like. I remember feeling that dread in my gut–change is coming. It’s about to be my “Senior Year” and my big finale as my last year in high school. Who wants to be the new kid in their Senior class?? I had a good thing going here in the “the States” with my BOOM, BOOM, BOOM BOOMing {Vengaboys} and my job and “my” life, and I wanted it to stay that way. I was outspoken about this to my parents…I can’t imagine what they went through. Torn from hearing this from their child and torn from hearing the call of their life’s call. WHEW. There were other contributing factors to this, but they came to me one evening and said this: “Michelle, we are giving you the choice of staying in America or going back to Africa. You make the decision, and we as family will do whatever you decide. If you want to stay, we’ll stay for another year.”

Uuuhhhmmm…..me? You mean I decide if our family goes back to Africa or stays in the States? ME? So, you’re telling me we could actually STAY here for me to finish out my Senior year? I was BLOWN away by this possibility! It sounded absolutely incredible. (There were so many other contributing factors to this as well, and my parents were prepared to stay in the States at this point.)

But God. I have walked with Jesus since I was 7 years old. I know His voice when I hear it, and He started to speak. My mom and dad gave me a week to decide. The ‘ear’ in my heart would not stop hearing His voice–that still small voice. I was in the shower one night, and I audibly heard God speak. The first time ever having His voice audible in my physical ears and not the ‘ear’ in my heart. He said this: “What is ONE year of your life compared to an eternity in hell for an African who needs to hear My truth?” That’s all I needed to hear! (Slightly freaked out, but HEY.)

I saw the big picture, and I THANK GOD for that! I can’t imagine where I’d be now. So many INCREDIBLE things happened because of this decision to go back on the mission field my Senior year. It wasn’t all rainbows and ponies, trust me. Is it ever? Maybe sometimes! I have screwed up maaaaany a time since then. But MANY people came to know Jesus as their Savior from our ministry in Africa. (My mom has actually written two books about our life!) In This Place and In Every Place by Kim L. Abernethy

There’s so many things I want to convey with this flashback, but what I will hone in on is this:

You can make your plans, but GOD directs your steps. Proverbs 16:9. Make ’em. DREAM ABOUT THEM. Taste them! But know THIS: God is bigger than any plans we {as humans} could ever possibly dream up or about. I am so very thankful for how God has directed my life’s steps. And no matter YOUR age: If you’re a young buck or an older person but still breathing air, God has steps designed for your plans. Let Him be GOD and direct and maneuver them. You absolutely will not regret it!

Guys. Gals. Listen! Have you ever overheard something or read something from someone or saw someone do something and took it in the way that was in your own reality realm or that “applied” to your little life bubble? Me! I have……

Recently, our oldest daughter received a note from a sweet little friend of her’s. To paraphrase, this note said something to the effect of this: “Hey. Can you do a better job of staying at home? I want to come play and be friends, but you’re gone so much. I don’t feel like we’re friends anymore.”

Now, to most adults this would read as “HEY. I miss you, my friend. I’d love more time with you!”

BUT…to the 9 year old mind, it read like this: “Hey…..I don’t want to be your friend anymore. I am not sure I want to play with you because I don’t get to see you enough. Bye Felicia….” {‘bye Felicia’ is bonus material}

Do you see the 3 stages that this SAME note went through? Poor little, innocent note.

1. I want to play with you more and be your friend. (Reality)
2. I want to play with you more and be your friend. (Reality, again.)
3. I don’t want to be your friend because I don’t see you enough.

SAME NOTE. 3 different stages.

How often do we hear what someone says, see what someone does or read something that someone wrote and we perceive that as reality and truth even? And what we heard, saw or read was done so through our own ‘glasses’ of hurt, unacceptance, anger, disappointment, betrayal, etc –and it wasn’t ANYTHING like it was actually intended to be. Sometimes it is. But, a LOT of times it’s not.

To really grow personally and professionally, let’s take off our ‘glasses’ and see things for what they really are. I am so guilty of this myself (to be honest). I’ve left my ‘glasses of hurt’, or ‘glasses of unacceptance’ or ‘glasses of defense’ ON and haven’t taken them OFF to see what is actually happening in real life. AND…most importantly–what is God saying about you and that situation? Remove the lies, but never leave a void. Refill with truth after the lies are depleted.

Just as I encouraged Layna, our tender kiddo, to SEE what was actually being said by her little friend–I encourage you and I. To take a step back, and really see something in it’s original intent and not through our own glasses of __________{you name it.} but through glasses of TRUTH. #notetoself

Well, hello there! Thank you for joining me on this *very* new endeavor. I have known for awhile now that WordPress would be a path that I “walk” down, but I never had the courage (or guts, if you will) to put my feet to the ground and WALK, per se. Welp–here I am and here I walk!

I know that I will look back to this very first post one day and think “Man…what the heck? I was such a little baby beginner. But at least I BEGAN…”

I have a natural knack of not ‘beginning’. I dream it, I think about it, and I live it out in my mind and my heart. But I’ve always been challenged with putting wheels to an idea or a notion or a thought. It’s not something that comes naturally, believe it or not! I can live with it in la-la land ALL the day long, but would never actually GO FOR IT in reality. Today changes that!

ShellsLife2Share is my Instagram handle and my Gmail address–well, because it’s true to it’s name. I share my life. My ups, downs and my ALL arounds. In person or social media.

Enjoy the ride with me! Some days are not so enjoyable–and quite frankly feel like drudgery. BUT, some are GLORIOUS! Absolutely beautiful representations of the fullness of this Earth and this life and what God has in store for all of us. I love it ALL, and I love YOU. Thanks for joining me!

 

To begin, begin. -William Wordsworth